I resolve

Some years I make New Year's Resolutions. Some years I don't bother. But when I make them, I really do try to keep them. My friend S and I like to come up with a theme for each year. The one I remember best was 2006: "Extreme Makeover Ashli Edition." At the end of that year I lamented to S that I didn't feel I'd lived up to my theme. S reminded me that I had actually started my own business and quit my day job that year. So yeah, I lived up to it.

I do have many failed resolutions, but I like to think of the successful ones. Like in 2007 when I resolved to lose 15 pounds. I lost 30. (OK, so maybe I've gained 10ish back over the last year, but still ...)

Last year, I didn't have a resolution. But I did have a prayer: We prayed (and asked friends to pray with us)  that the flood house situation would be resolved by March 18 (the one-year anniversary of the flood). God answers prayer! Just a couple weeks after we started praying that way, the county contacted us with a new plan. We had their buy out offer by the end of February. As I said, God answers prayer! It turned out to be a pretty big year.

So this year, I really have some important resolutions. Goals I am serious about. For accountability's sake (both personal accountability and public accounability) I'll share them here:

• I resolve to lose those 10 pounds again.
• I resolve to make a budget every single month and work with all my might to stick to it.
  
• I resolve to use a kinder tone of voice with my family when I am stressed.
• I resolve to blog. Regularly. All three blogs.
• I resolve to plan a less-busy schedule for my family.
• I resolve to plan a family vacation and to visit my extended family in Utah this year (two trips).
  
• I resolve to stop resolving and start doing.

This year's theme: "Resolutions. And I mean it."

Defining moments of 2009

I know I am a few days late for this post, but I've been trying for that long to figure what I wanted to say. What were the best moments of 2009 (thankfully there were many)? What were the worst moments of 2009 (thankfully there were few)?

I finally decided that there really were two defining moments of the past year -- events that literally changed my year and altered my history.

Unbelievably, they happened on the same day.

It was a Sunday in late February. Strangely I do not remember the exact date. I could figure it out if I did a little searching through last year's calendar, but I don't think the exact date really matters.

Defining moment #1:
As I said it was a Sunday. It was just after midnight, so it was VERY early on that Sunday. B and I had just arrived home with Big A from a JBQ Tournament in St. Louis. It had been a very long trip, as the weather was treacherous and a bad accident had shut down the highway for hours. We were exhausted. Still, we flipped through the mail to see what had come in over the few days we were gone.

And there it was. A package from the county. We knew it would contain an offer for them to buy out the flood property that had plagued us for almost a year. We were all nervous as we opened it, because the number they offered would mean everything to us. Would it be enough to pay off the mortgage? Would it be enough to make it worthwhile to sell the property, or would we have to rebuild? Would the contents of that package signal an end to our nightmare?

The answer was incredible. The amount was more than we hoped and prayed for. Enough to pay off the mortgage and good chunk of the rest of our debt ... and still more for a down payment on a new house. The county had been more than fair, offering us fair-market PRE-flood value. The value before the housing market tanked. The deal would also allow us to keep our insurance money, which had been another unknown piece of the puzzle.

Even though it would be a few months before the deal was done and we had the money in hand, that was definitely THE defining moment of the year. We were able to stop living in the unknown and start making actual decisions about our future. Our financial issues were solved at that point. It was our proof that even terrible stories have happy endings.

So we had our moment and then we went to bed. And later than morning, we woke up and soon faced what would be ...

Defining Moment #2
Later that morning I took a home pregnancy test. Even though I was on the pill, I had reason to suspect I might be pregnant. B and I had discussed the possibility for a day or two. I decided it was time to find out.

It was positive. For a few minutes I was upset. This hadn't been in the plans at all. B wasn't upset; he was only excited. It took a few minutes for me to catch up, but I did. It doesn't take a mother very long to fall in love with her baby.

That was a defining moment because it changed our view of the make-up of our family. I realized I had room in my heart for another child. We realized that something we thought we didn't want was actually something we wanted very much.

That moment changed me instantly forever. And it set me up for the greatest sadness so far of my life: miscarrying at 11 weeks and having a D&C. Until that point, I didn't know I could be so sad. Upset? Yes, I knew upset. Stress? Yes, I knew stress. Anger? Yes, I knew anger. But I didn't really know sadness until this happened to me.

These are the two moments that defined my 2009. Now it's onward and upward to 2010.

Uncle Eddie the Ed's Guitar Lessons

I have another Christmas story for you. This one illustrates how much my brothers understand, love and care for my girls -- even though they live so far apart and only see them once a year. You might think the distance would mean the girls don't know their far away uncles and aunts. Why, the aunts (my bother's way cool wives) have only even seen the girls a handful of times. But physical distance has not hampered their relationships with the girls. It does a mother's heart good.

So last summer my Little A wrote a letter to her Uncle Eddie. In the letter, written and spelled ever so adorably as only a 5-year-old could do), she asked him to come to our house and teach her to play the guitar (she calls it a "kitar.") It was so darn cute, I knew it would just kill Uncle Eddie to get the letter and have to tell her no, he couldn't come right now.

What he did was call her and promise her that he would find a way to teach her the kitar ... and he made good on his promise. And my other brother got involved as well.

First, Uncle Craig and Aunt Beckah gave her a kitar for Christmas. Just the kind my Little A would love -- all pink and sparkly and just her size.

Then she had a present from Uncle Eddie. He recorded her his own DVD teaching how to play. He even had a full-size pink kitar to teach her with!!! I'm told my father found that pink kitar, so the whole family got involved in the project.

The video is so cute and funny, and it just melts my heart. I have the best family in the whole world!!! Thank you all for granting Little A's wish and caring for us so much.

Here she is after opening the DVD. The look on her face says it all.

Christmas in review

There is so much to remember about this Christmas. For all of us, I think the most special part was simply being in our new home for the holidays. This Christmas gave new meaning to the phrase, "I'll be home for Christmas." What a blessing it was. I recently went back and read last year's Christmas letter where I wrote about the uncertainty we were facing. A year ago we had no idea how ...  or even if ... the flood situation would resolve. We didn't know if we'd have a home by Christmas 2009. And we certainly didn't expect things to end as wonderfully as they did. We never would have guessed that we'd spend Christmas in this house. We are truly thankful. We enjoyed the decorating (OK, we still had some of the traditional fighting involved in getting a house decorated for Christmas, but we still enjoyed it!)

We invited guests over several times during the season, trying to make the most out of enjoying our home for Christmas. We started with our "adopted students" from EU -- we all enjoyed a traditional Christmas dinner one Sunday afternoon before they wrapped up the semester and headed home for the holidays.

We also had some younger guests -- my friend J and her little ones dropped by with goodies one afternoon.

Of course we attended the annual Christmas party at Daddy's work -- where we ate very well and  saw Santa! This is one of the girls' favorite parts of Christmas. For Big A it is the fried chicken they always serve. For Little A it's the Barbie doll that Santa gives to each little girl.

We also attended a Christmas banquet at my work, followed by a wonderful Christmas concert. But somehow I failed to get photos of that event.

The biggest Christmas shindig we hosted was our LifeGroup Christmas party. What a fun night! Rather than exchange gifts with each other, we had each child pick out a new pair of pajamas for children at Isabel's House, a local crisis nursery. We also collected a variety of other toiletry items to donate. During the party, the kids all made cards for residents at Isabel's House. My kids and I drove out there on the 23rd to deliver our gifts, and we were able to talk to employees for a while and learn all about Isabel's House. It was very interesting, and it was a great opportunity for Big A and Little A to understand the need that exists for so many children in our world -- even so close to home.

In addition to working on the Isabel's House project, our LifeGroup party included lots of eating and laughing, and playing Catchphrase (the BEST party game!) Here are some photos from that evening:

Of course it wouldn't be Christmas without our annual cookie decorating party on the 23rd -- those are the girls' best friends, Big K and Little N :-)

Finally Christmas Eve arrived. And Big A and Little A were in for a VERY BIG surprise! Around 10 a.m., Santa made a surprise stop at our house to deliver a gift so special it could not be left over night. The girls must have been very good this year ... because their gift was a SHIH TZU PUPPY!

We named her Angel Noel, in honor of Christmas. We call her Angel. And isn't this baby just the most angelic little creature you ever did see?

On Christmas Eve we packed up Angel and piled in the car with all of our gifts for B's family and headed over the river and through the woods to grandmother's house. We had a wonderful dinner and time with the family, and we were all spoiled rotten by Grandma and Papa. They got us a fire pit for our rock porch (YAY!) and lots of other great stuff. The girls were delighted with their gifts. Little A says her favorite was a Madame Alexander doll named Gracie and her clothes (specifically: "The pony shirt and fancy jeans!") Big A's favorite was a big art kit with drawing paper and a new Nintendo DS game.

Here's a picture of Grandma and Papa with the grandkids.

Late on Christmas Eve, we gathered back in our living room by the tree as we always do to read the Christmas story from the Bible and pray together as a family. Before we nestled the little ones all snug in their beds, there was another surprise in store for us. My mom and dad had sent us a card with instructions  to open it on Christmas Eve. We opened the card and I began to read a letter that made me blubber and cry so much that I couldn't possibly have thought to take a photo of the moment. The news was that my parents are going to pay for both of my brothers and their wives, and our niece London, to come out to see us this year.

Christmas could have stopped at that moment and it would have been perfect. I can't thank my parents enough for this incredible gift. And I can't wait to show the gang our new home. We live far too many miles apart, and the distance is agonizing.

You can't top the Christmas gift of our Savior being born 2,000 years ago and the promise that we'll live with Him in the future, but a close second-best gift is the gift of family for today.

So as I said, Christmas *could have* stopped right there ... but it didn't. We woke up to many delights on Christmas morning.

That's the end of this year's Christmas review. See ya in 2010!

Merry Christmas!

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Getting political again

I remember in college when I was a freshman, I made a comment in an American government class about party politics. I said that I believed in "voting for the man" and not "the party."

The way my professor responded changed my view of politics entirely. He explained that despite a man's (legislator's/woman's) best intentions, that in our political system the party controls the man (legislator/woman). You can vote for "the man" every time, but in the end, his party will control his vote. This plays out time and time again in American politics. Though it sounds very altruistic to believe that "the man" will vote his conscious, It doesn't happen that way. What's altruistic is not realistic.

What happened with Sen. Ben Nelson of Nebraska is a perfect example of my professor's lesson that day.

I wonder how much he was threatened.

Christmas is a Christian holiday -- U.N. liberals say so

There's always a paradox in the way  non-religious liberals attack Christianity. (NOTE: I am not calling all liberals non-religious. I am clarifying which liberals I am talking about.)

Contradictions can be found in most of their arguments. This one hit me today -- Bah Humbug, Christmas Trees not allowed at Climate Conference. The U.N. has banned Christmas trees from the world's largest climate conference, citing the fact that a religious holiday should not be acknowledged at a U.N. event, basing the argument on the fact that Christmas is, in face, a religious holiday.

I have very often read articles and quotes from non-religious types, who blame Christians for "taking over" a secular holiday. They claim the celebration of the winter solstice was stolen by Christians who are just trying to take every holiday away from them and make it religious.

So I wonder why these liberal types who say Christmas isn't even Christian would ban the Christmas tree. After all, the Christmas tree is really a secular symbol. They are not, say, banning nativity scenes from the conference.

I know Christmas, CHRISTmas, is a sacred, religious Christian holiday. But many non-religious types (I dare say who are all at the helm of this conference) say it's not. It's a celebration of the winter solstice. So if that's true, why ban the Christmas tree?

I think I will hold on to this article for the next time I read about how Christmas was never supposed to be Christian. Because now they've acknowledged that in fact it is.

Just thinkin...